What Peace Looks Like

One of the reasons I wanted to be an exchanges student is that I desire peace in the world. I desperately dream of showing people that there is a sameness inside all of us. We are more the same than different, we all love, we all laugh, we all cry. I believe once people CHOOSE to see the similarities instead of the differences there will be peace in the world. To some this is an impossible dream, and to them I say " I have already realized my dream, I am creating peace right now,". These past weeks in Italy I had forgotten my dream. My dreams had been lost in a confusion of homesickness, loneliness, frustration and embarrassment.  I had forgotten my reasons for being here, but now after an amazing 4 days at the AFS camp in Torino, I remember. I remember because, now I know what peace looks like. Before the camp,  peace was an idea. I had never truly seen it in action, but now I know and let me tell you: It is amazing!
So what is peace you ask?

Peace is a group hug that includes 6 different countries, peace is half the world posing like a ninja for a picture, peace is a crazy group picture, with every kids from every continent, taken at midnight. Peace is laughter, peace is joy, peace is seeing each other as we are, without fear of the unknown. This is my definition of peace, you can see it in these pictures and hopefully feel it in your heart. And now I see the sameness inside of us everywhere. I see it in school in Italy: when students complain about homework, or talk during class. I see it in my italian family: when we watch t.v. when we hug. I saw it at the camp: when every student knew the Korean  Gangnam style song( even though none of us are Korean). I hope to carry this peace inside of me, just as I know that every student in that camp will. Years from now we will all be adults, living on our own in the world, and years from now we may run into fear and racism, but now I know that these 50 students will never hate the unknown because they fear it. At the camp we knocked down our preconceptions of each other and saw only the person inside. So what is peace? Peace is AFS, peace is spreading knowledge of the world instead of fear. I am creating peace right now, I am changing the world by being openminded and trying to learn new things, by growing and crying and laughing and making mistakes in italian. 470 students came to italy this year, and I can guarantee you that these students and every person they meet will never be the same . So thank you AFS for teaching me what peace really looks like!

Milan, Pizza, and Accomplishments

It is a month since I left California, and on Tuesday it will be a month that i have been in Italy! Last weekend I went to Milan with a few friends from school. As promised I am publicly stating that their english was perfect and they were amazing tour guides :) . We first went to the Duomo which is a very important Gothic building. I was shocked by the sheer size of the building and the intricately carved facade. When we went inside my jaw literally dropped. I mean we have nothing like that in California. What shocked me most though was the extreme mixing of the old and the new. For example, the Duomo, a gothic building, has a large advertisement hung on the side for a clothing store. It was like this all over Milan. Old buildings and buildings created in that tradition had flat screens outside to advertise. I found this mix a little confusing because in California everything is new and the old things are disregarded or destroyed. Milan was very fun and i got to shop and try some great food. All of my classmates are very nice and include me in everything I am very lucky!
I am a little frustrated with the language because i feel like I'm not learning anything, but i have decided to try and speak more in italian even though i feel like an absolute idiot most of the time. I just can not hide my California girl accent no matter what i do. The worst is numbers my tre sounds like tray and my due sounds like do-ah. Luckily for me i have several of these in my phone number -_-.
I made a pizza a couple days ago :). I was really good at rolling out the dough for the square one, but the circle was another story. it is much more difficult to make a circle than a square lol. It ended up great though and very yummy.
This month has gone by very fast and I think soon I will be able to understand and communicate a lot more in Italian. One month is a great place to be because I am 1/10 done. Another nine of these doesn't seem like such a big deal.
I have been making a little progress with the other languages I have to study. I have just given up in french. I mean the make one little sound and it has like 15 letters. But, i have started taking the first year german classes in addition to my fourth year class and it is very fun. I can actually understand a little of what is going on for once and that is a huge relief lol. I think working on German is actually helping me  learn Italian , if that makes any sense. Because they are learning very simple words in German and I know those words in Italian so it helps.
As far as applying to college goes I am not very concerned about it surprisingly. I actually feel ahead and i know exactly where I am applying and what i have to do. The excitement of going to college next year actually makes it easier sometimes when i am homesick because i know that doing this and getting through this year will help me get into the colleges i want to go to.
Things with the family are getting easier too. I don't feel like a stranger anymore, but it is definitely nice to have some alone time. I have decided that any time i feel like i want to cry because i don't understand I am going to smile instead and it actually works very well.
I'm trying to join the choir, theater club, and animal shelter here, and hopefully that will work out because it would be really fun.
The weather here has been really nice this week. It is like 60 F in the mornings and 72F in the afternoons and sunny. I think that is unusual for this time of year, which is lucky for me because I am freezing anyway.
Well I can never think of what to post so any questions or anything you would like to know about please comment or message me so i can write about it!

2 Weeks

I've been here for two weeks now and that feels like a huge accomplishment, these two weeks have felt like they lasted for months because each day is so exhausting. The adjustment to a new culture and language is exhausting and everyday is a battle to understand, or at least pretend to.
School is very good. I have absolutely no idea what is going on in most of my classes, but i do understand the math class because it is pre-calculus and I did that in America. I never thought i would be so happy to see conic sections.I remember the first day we had math class and the prof started talking and I was already preparing for a nice nap, when suddenly I saw her draw an Ellipse. That entire class i felt like the smartest person in the room, which is a nice change because most of the time here i feel like a bumbling idiot. I have english, german, latin, french, and italian classes, so I'm trying to learn like four languages at once. It is significantly harder when you don't understand the language they are being taught in. It is really hard to stay awake at school because i have nothing to focus on haha. It is getting better though, i didn't fall asleep during class yesterday :). Before i came to Italy i was warned alot that people would dress differently, they don't. I think I already mentioned this, but the same brands are popular among teenagers (Abercrombie, Hollister) and Skinny jeans are still very in here ( :(  skinny jeans only look good on skinny people). I'm interested to see what happens to fashion when it gets cold here because last year it got to be -22 celsius (-7.6 F). I can't even imagine that cold. However, one difference i have noticed concerning fashion is that it is okay to wear the same outfit two days in a row here. There is a lot of accesorizing with scarves. Living with a host family is definitely been the hardest adjustment for me because they have a lot of rules and I'm not used to that. I still get really frustrated and I always feel like I'm doing something wrong. The language barrier to really difficult to overcome and most of the time i can't get through what I'm trying to say at all. When i can't understand something is makes me sad and very homesick. Right now I honestly don't think I'm strong enough to do an entire year here it seems too difficult. I have made  a lot of friends and the kids in my class are very nice. Yesterday I went to Alessandria (big city 20 minutes away from Tortona) with my friend Chiara and we went shopping. The shopping was great, but it was hard to find clothes that fit because i am like taller than this entire country. Today I am going to the cinema to see Magic Mike. I am excited because that is definitely a movie i do not need to speak italian to understand. As I try to learn Italian my English is disintigrating sorry.
The meals here are different. Breakfast is usually coffee and like cookies. Then lunch is pasta, then some sort of meat and maybe fruit. Dinner is the same. They eat a lot of nutella here and all of the water is carbonated. I went out to pizza with my friends last week and discovered that the soda also tastes different. I got a Fanta orange and it was more bitter than the ones in America.
I have definitely run into alot of stereotypes about Americans and it dissapoints me. They think we are pretty stupid and that our school is very easy and we only eat junk food. So far my American high school is far more difficult than the one here. Also they older generations seem to think because we can drive at 16 that we grow up too fast, but here kids are smoking, drinking, and going to clubs at 13. It is interesting to see they think driving is more freedom than that.
Speaking of driving, everytime i get in a car here I feel like I am going to die. The driving here is crazy. THe streets are only big enough for one car but there are two lanes going opposite ways, people drive waaay too fast, and leave no space between cars when they stop. I have had to ride on  a moped a couple times and it is terrifying. You keep your hands behind you like underneath the seat and I swear I am going to fall off. Apparently i don't ride correctly so i get made fun of  "the American who can's ride on a motto". All i can think of while riding is that the tiny helmet i have on is not going to save me if we crash. my head just keeps chanting "brain bucket, brain bucket, brain bucket,".
Next Saturday I am going to Milan with some friends and the Saturday after that to a club! I am very excited.

la ragazza americana il primo giorno di scuola

first day of school! very different the teachers move and the students dont. there are only 22 students in my class (4a linguistico) and everyone already knows eachother and the teachers. when i walked into the classroom it went completely silent lol. over the past days i have learned to recognize one phrase very well, la ragazza americana, the american girl. that is how i am introuduced and referred to. they love my california accent here and think its hilarious when i say los angeles california. anyway my classes are fisica, la historia del arte, historia, italiano, francese, latino, matematica, religione, and inglese. in english that is physics,art history,history, italian literature, french, latin,  math (not sure what kind yet i have that tomorrow), catholic religion, and english. the kids, even the stupid boys ( you know the kind), are like crazy smart compared to americans. they speak the languages so well. i mean they are reading books in these languages like 1984, a christmas carol, animal farm, shakespeare! we get to read shakespeare in english class and act it out so thats good something i can understand finally. the teachers were nice kinda. some of the tried to include me and others jsut ignored me. the ones that ignored me i raised my hand and made myself part of the conversation which seemed to work pretty well. school starts at 7 50 and is over at 12 50 and is from monday to saturday. its like a super easy amount of time. at school it is inappropriate to wear anything that doesnt go past your calves and cover your shoulders.. did that make sense? lol now i dont speak english or italian it is really surprising how when you try to learn something new you forget something else. t-ahirts and jeans no tanktops or shorts. so that leaves me with 3 shirts and 2 pairs of pants that i can wear to school... lol  i need to go shopping! already it is colder than in california! today was cloudly and, piove, rain. very very beautiful! i need to buy shoes lol mine are all wet haha. so school was good! in march the class is taking a trip to london to watch shakespeare i think we will be gone for 5 days. i hope my visa will let me go all the permissio soggiorno  ( residence permit) stuff is like super confusing. things are good. io sto bene, i am fine. its not exactly fun yet because it is still uncomfortable and new but i hope in a couple weeks it will be okay. my friend Giami in Denmark says that the first week is the hardest but that after a month it gets better. more school tomorrow...... maybe i will finally remember peoples names lol.

First Days in Italy

so first thing the keyboard is completely different here so in this post there will be many typos and no punctuation. deal with it. its a bit weird i feel like im stranded on an island because i didnt bring a phone (should have) and my computer isnt compatible with the internet my family has so until that is resolved i will post as often as possible. my family is really nice and they are trying really hard to speak english so we can communicate but it is hard on both sides. ceci my sister is 22. i am running on very little energy so this will be a string of unrelated thoughts. i miss home this is very very hard. the hardest thing i have ever done in my life.v i didnt think it would be hard but i was totaly wrong. there is something to be said about comfort. i dont know how anything works here even the light switches look different. my rooom is really nce they painted it yellow for me and it is very spacious and pretty. the house is three stroies and very comfortable. there is only one bathroom but it is huge. the switch to flush the toilet is above thetoilet and is a button and not a lever. i have no idea how to work the shower lol. i have given my family some of the gifts i got them and they love it. the weather is hot during the day and cold during the night. moist but not too humid. i wish i had known my computer wasnt going to work i could have saved myself alot of trouble on the 16 hours of flying 4 hours in a bus and 7 hours on a train. it is very beautiful. everyone smokes. all the kids drink and smoke. my family doesnt drink at all. learning a new language is exhausting i am always tired but i already feel as if i have learned a little more than i knew before. the one level of rosetta stone that afs made us do before leaving seemed pointless while i was doping it but it has been a life saver! if they keep having afsers do that do it all! i start school tomorrow and i am really nervous i have to walk which is good but i have a broken toe that is jsut not going to heal apparently and it is so swollen so none of my shoes fit. yay constant pain and embarrassment. afs said no one wears shorts and everyone dresses very formally. that is absolutely wrong everyone wears shorts and they dtress exactly the same as we do. breakfast is at 7 lunch at 1 then rest until 3 and dinner at 8 or 9 party until 1 and then start all over again. i dont know how they do it. i feel like a bother to everyone i try to speak too and it is discoruaging but then something will happen and everything is okay again. because i am on my own it is hard to keep things in perspectibve and keep my emotions in check like sometimes i just think this is horrinble i am stupid and i want to cry and then three mintues later ceci invites me somewhere and it is fine. this is hard. now i cant speak italian but i am trying so hard to speak italian that my english sucks. i am worried i am going to get lost walking to school tomorrow. i need to buy school supplies today . i forgot my tongue scraper. there are alot of bees. alot of hand motions like a whole other language i need to learn there are literally thousands. hundreds of different ways to flip people off. i went to like a street fair last night ( you have no idea how long it took me to remember how to say that in english) there were fireworkd snd i hung out with ceci and here friends. i am like an alien first people are afriad to talk to me and then its have you met the lakers do you surf. they do lsiten to american music here but there are actually alot of really famous italian singggers. this giy ligabue is super popular and alessandra morsoso ( i have no idea how to spell their names). overall everything is good just very difficult. i thought it would be more carefree and easy but it is so hard that i cant even describe it. anyone who says otherwise is either lying or fluent in italian. did i mention i have a nonno and a nonna they are really nive. eberyone knows everyone here and is impossible to go anywhere without sayinghi to someone. thats all the time i have because now i need to go buy school supplies. hopefully next time i post i will be a little moer cogent. ciao. oh and only old poeèple do the kissy thing the firdst timethey meet.

Packing and Host Family Gifts!

I have officially finished packing! it took several hours and three rounds of packing and unpacking, but I'm done! When i was packing i kept on searching for what other AFSers had packed but couldn't seem to find a list anywhere, so here is what I packed.
1. 2 pairs of jeans
2. 1 pair of slacks
3. 1 pair of jean shorts
4. 1 pair of green capri's
5. 7 shirts
6. 2 long sleeve shirts
7. 2 white tanktops
8. 14 underwear
9. 14 pairs of socks
10. 1 pair of flip flops
11. 2 pairs of walking shoes
12. 1 pair of flats
13. 1 pair of heels
14. 1 pair of water proof shoes
15. 1 pair of tennis shoes
16. 1 black blazer
17. 3 sweater jacket things
18. 2 scarves
On the AFS facebook page people often ask if they should bring their computers or not. I would definitely say yes because of school work, but also if you are applying to college while abroad (like me).
I also got all of my host family gifts picked out and packed. In my host family I have a mom, dad, and a sister. For my mom I got oven mits that say I love USA on them, blackberry jam (very californian), a coffee cup that says California on it, american measuring cups and spoons, and I made a cookbook of all of my favorite recipes that only americans eat  (stuff from thanksgiving, chocolate chip cookies, breakfast stuff). For my dad I got chocolate american money! I thought it was brilliant, there is a 100 dollar chocolate bar and also the chocolate coins. In addition, i got Obama candy (yes it exists), and a pretty poster of my city logo. For my sister, Cecilia, I got a Hollister shirt that says southern California on it, I made her a necklace, and got some salt water taffy. Plus i went to the beach and collected some shells and sand and put them in cute containers to give to my host family and the friends I plan to make!  My host mom messaged me that they are getting my room ready and that i start school on September 12th at 7:50 in the morning. Exciting stuff!

Visa Update and Skype Success!

On August 20 I had my appointment at the Italian consulate in L.A. everything went smoothly thanks to my mom's hyper vigilant preparation. Even though the instructions for applying for the visa were super confusing we had all of the papers they needed! Some questions that my mom and I had when we were preparing the visa papers were: Do both parents need to be present, Does the visa cost anything, and how many copies of everything do you need? No, both parents do not need to be present just have the appropriate documents signed by both parents and notarized. No, the visa doesn't cost anything and it is actually put into your passport (i didn't know that). I would suggest that you bring three copies of all of the documents your bring this is because the consulate keeps the originals of everything you give them and also keeps a copy, so in case anything happens your parents should have a copy too. If anyone has any questions about visa stuff please ask! So while it was exciting to finally go to the Italian Consulate it was about as much fun as going to the DMV. They were in the process of moving buildings and it was super busy so everyone was in a pretty sour mood. I am expecting my visa in the mail any day now so hopefully it arrives soon. 

I had a second Skype chat with my host family last week, this time without Giammy (their son, who is currently in Denmark with AFS)  there to help us translate our chat lasted about 12 minutes, which I thought was a pretty good time considering I don't speak Italian (Io non parlo Italiano!) and they don't speak english. Right now my Italian mama, papà, and sorella Cecilia are at their beach house on the Ligurian Sea! They said they will take me to the beach house. I really like my family and they have already made plans for us to go to the beach house, Milano, and Firenze (Florence). Milano is about an hour from Tortona and Firenze is about 3 hours from Tortona. 

I also had a meeting with the Vice Principal of my American high school to make sure I was all set to go abroad for my senior year. It was nice to know that after a year of crazy hard work that I am finally done. So yay I'm graduated from high school, not officially because I didn't want to jeopardize my chances of getting into AFS, I will receive my diploma the day I get back from Italy. Everyone at school is really excited for me to go and they wished me well. If i were to stay in America this year I would start school on Monday, but since I'm leaving I don't have to go, which is kind of fun. 

13 days left until the adventure begins!